What a Shit-Show

It is 3:29 am and I will soon be crawling into bed. My online delivery store closed at 3 am, therefore my ‘working’ scheduled hours are late. However as a small business owner, my work is never really done. It is not like you can turn the thoughts off, the worries off, and the financial stress does not go away. I worry a lot. I feel this anxiety is all I know.

Prior to starting my online business, I had a financially secure position within the mental health field. I honestly believed I would be employed within this organization until I retired – boy was I naive. Anything can change overnight. Where you are now – may not be where you are a year from now. I have to accept what I cannot change, but I will advocate for me.

I mean – if I cannot stand up for mental health and myself- how in the sweet lord could I have genuinely advocated for the individuals I supported. I cannot go into great detail currently as my situation is awaiting a Human Rights conference, but I will state, mental health discrimination and stigma is alive and strong. It exists with organizations that it absolutely shouldn’t.

I was employed by a not-for-profit organization for 14 years, and because my voice and illness was not treated fairly, heard, or respected- I lost my position, medical benefits, and retirement security.

What a shit-show of a change. Talk about anxiety, depression, and stigma in a small community. Fingers crossed that the outcome is positive.

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